DrPortiaFaceShotToday, let’s begin to conquer disappointment! Disappointment and expectations are companions. Typically, when our expectations of others, and/or situations are not met it leads to disappointment. As a way of trying to prevent disappointment, sometimes we may find ourselves no longer having any expectations. We develop a “whatever” attitude; if I do not expect anything, I cannot be disappointed. It seems like a good solution; but it is only a temporary fix. Over time this approach, typically results in sadness, depression, and cynicism because you no longer allow yourself to hope. It often stops you from being able to connect with others on a deep emotional level. So, what is a better way to recover from disappointment?

 First, acknowledge it; “I am disappointed.” Secondly, grieve over it, even if this means, crying, screaming, and just being in a funky mood – for a while. Thirdly, if you have a close friend, talk about it. If you are a person of faith, pray about it – sometimes, what seems to be a disappointment is actually a rescue. Next, determine if your expectations were realistic of the person or situation. If they were not, how did you get to that point? Remember, we have all been there, and made the mistake of unrealistic expectations. So do not “beat yourself up over that.” And sometimes your expectations were not unrealistic; the person lacked integrity, had some other serious character flaw, or the situation was unfair, and unjust. This can be the hardest instances of disappointment to overcome. In these cases, forgive yourself and forgive them. You may find that you cycle through each of these steps several times; before fully releasing the disappointment; that is okay. The main thing is do not get stuck in that place of disappointment. It will stop you from being able to receive the good that life has to offer you.

“Don’t let today’s disappointment cast a shadow on tomorrow’s dreams.”


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